What Happened in Cleveland?
At this point I’m not the first to say this, but still I’d like to say it: it’s shocking that we were not taken to Cleveland.
Cleveland, and all that was meant to transpire there, was completely disregarded by this show. Are you trying to tell me things went well between Che Diaz and Too-Into-It Miranda With The High Pitched Voice? That these seamless communicators had a nice, uneventful time? That Miranda didn’t, at minimum, walk in on Che getting it on with their Cleveland paramour?
I’m not trying to say I know a lot about Cleveland, but I know some things, because I’ve been there—several times. There is nowhere sexier or more dramatic. Cleveland is sweaty promise and emotional peril. I say this partly because I attended Jewish youth group (ever heard of it) events there as a teenager and once had a three-way kiss in a basement with my friend and a boy wearing a gold Chai necklace. Cleveland also boasts an aquarium, at least one “extremely seedy dive bar” where Julianne Escobedo Shepherd danced to Prince for five hours straight in 2005, and the Cleveland History Center, where you can learn that it was almost named “Cleaveland.”
So: they should have shown us Cleveland, because lots can happen there and it can be very intense.